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Friday, December 13, 2013

Zoo Joke: Jesus is Watching You...

One night, a jewel thief is creeping through a museum, helping himself to precious gems, when suddenly he trips a burglar alarm.  Hearing the sirens going off, he slings his bag over his shoulder, rushes from the building, and flees into the adjacent park.  The sirens are getting louder and closer, and he knows the police are hot on his trail, so he hops a fence and decides to hide... in the city zoo.

Running to the first building that he finds, he tests the door, finds it unlocked, and ducks inside.  Then, leaning against a wall, he stops to catch his breath.  It is then that he hears the voice.

"Jesus is watching you!"

The burglar jumps with a start and shines his flashlight around.  He sees no one.  Thinking that he must have imagined it, he starts to look around for a place to hide, when he hears the voice again.

"Jesus is watching you!"

Again, the burglar takes out his light and shines it around.  Again he sees no one.  He walks around in the darkness, looking for the unseen speaker, when he hears the voice one more time:

"Jesus is watching you!"

Spinning around, he shines his light and this time sees the speaker - a small, green parrot, sitting on a perch.

"Hey, you, bird!" the burglar says, "Was that you saying that, 'Jesus is watching you?'"

"Yep," the parrot replies.

The burglar sighs, relieved.  "You scared me for a minute.  Say, what's you're name little guy?"

"Fluffy", says the bird.

"Fluffy?  What a stupid name.  What idiot names a bird 'Fluffy'"

At that instant, the burglar feels something smooth and dry brush against his leg, then hears a soft hiss from behind him.

"The same idiot," the parrot said, "that named the cobra 'Jesus.'"

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