Vince: Yes, yes, yes! I think I do! I don't turn you on anymore because you've got the hots for a gorilla!
Willa: It's not sexual...
Vince: He's clearly more attractive than I am, isn't he?
After several years of working with zoo animals, I've gotten used to the idea that every once in a while, I'm going to meet an animal that fixates on me, personally. Sometimes it's one that hates my guts, sometimes it's one that wants to be best friends... and sometimes, there's an animal that wants to be more than friends ("I'm flattered, but sheesh, tone it down, this is a professional atmosphere...")
I've had a fair number of animal crushes - a cockatoo that wanted to snuggle constantly, and would viciously attack anyone - especially any female human - who was standing to close to her favorite boy-toy. There's been a spider monkey, a crane, and an African crested porcupine, each who had a claim on me (I sometimes wonder what would happen if they all met suddenly - an epic fight? Angry accusations of cheating?). At any rate, it's hard to do your job when you've got a porcupine trying to make love to your left shoe.
Not that workplace "romances" can't be helpful - sometimes the pair bond between a keeper and an individual animal is so strong that the animal really does consider the keeper to be its mate, which can not only be useful in some breeding scenarios, but also is great for providing other keepers with comedic materials for years to come.
Evidence this fellow (Meet Walnut, the crane who fell in love with her zookeeper) at the Smithsonian Conservation Biology Institute. TL;DR version: Walnut, an endangered white-naped crane, hates other cranes, but loves Chris, her keeper. By going through courtship rituals and artificial insemination, Walnut's valuable genes have been passed on to the next captive generation.
Walnut solicits Chris. (Warren Lynch/SCBI)
What I'd never heard of before was members of the public falling in (non-platonic) love with a zoo animal. But, then this story from Japan made the rounds.
I'll be completely honest - I've seen lots of gorillas at lots of zoos and have no idea what makes this guy - rather than any of the others - so special. If you're going to pick a gorilla to fantasize about, why not Durrell's Jambo, or Binti Jua at Brookfield Zoo - they at least have celebrity hero status as well as good looks. Sorry girls, but from the way the zoo describes it, he's already spoken for... and I doubt any of you really want to take up the argument with any of the female gorillas. Maybe watch King Kong a few times until the fantasy passes.
Shabani, the 18-year old gorilla at the Higashiyama Zoo, gives the camera his "come-hither" stare. Getty Images
No comments:
Post a Comment