A warder, or beefeater, at the Tower of London, Jones has watched
stoically as his life – and marriage – have deteriorated steadily since the
unexpected death of his young son. Now,
he goes through life in a dream-like stupor, his only interests being his pet
tortoise and his newfound fascination with collecting and cataloging types of
rain. When he is finally called onto
the carpet of his boss’s office, it is with the expectation that he will
finally be fired.
A very different, much less predictable path presents
itself.
In the alternate, fictitious world of Julia Stuart, explored
in her novel The Tower, The Zoo, and The
Tortoise, Queen Elizabeth II has made the most unexpected decision to
restore a forgotten piece of the Tower of London’s ancient history – its zoo. Having recently found herself buried under an
avalanche of diplomatic animal gifts from various heads of state from around
the globe, HRH decides to put her royal pets in a different setting than the
London Zoo. Having heard of Jones and
his long-lived pet tortoise, she decides that he is the man for the job, and quickly
commissions the construction of a new menagerie at the Tower.
Wild animals in makeshift facilities cared for by someone
with a passing familiarity with them (in that he has heard of, at least, some
of them before they arrived), set in the middle of one of the biggest tourist
attractions in one of the biggest cities in the world.
It goes about as well as you would expect, or slightly
better than it probably would in real life.
Animals escape. Animals
fight. Animals cause mischief with
antics that most zookeepers would take in stride but which are perhaps not what
your average beefeater had in mind when he took the job. The menagerie becomes increasingly popular
and grows.
The animals provide much of the comedy of the novel, but
much of the book’s drama is focused around the human characters. The crumbling marriage of Balthazar and his
Greek wife, Hebe, is a central pillar of the book, as the reader is left to
wonder how two people drifted so far apart, and whether there is any way that
the novelist can nudge them back together.
There is also the rest of the Tower’s human occupants, from a lovelorn
preacher who dabbles in written erotica to a vengeful Ravenmaster who is
convinced that one of the newfangled animal attractions is responsible for the
death of one of his charges, as well as the bizarre circus that is Hebe’s job
at the London Underground Lost Property Office.
When I picked Ms. Stuart’s novel off of a library shelf, I’d
assumed that it was going to be a period story, set from anywhere between the
Middle Ages and the Victorian Era, that would deal with the actual, historical
menagerie. Nope. This is better. A lot less realistic, but very humorous and
enjoyable. You certainly won’t learn
much about animals from it – and even less about proper zookeeping (I actually
cringed at the ongoing plot arc about a pair of albatrosses that are separated
by the formation of the new menagerie – one, owned by the Queen, moves to the
Tower while it’s mate is left at the London Zoo. Both birds pine pitifully for each
other. I mean, come on, either leave
both or bring both!)
Little fiction about animals is
actually about animals, of
course. In most fiction, the animals are
introduced to help the author teach us more about ourselves (though you will learn a decent amount about the
Tower of London itself). It’s a fun read
– just try not to take it too seriously… I’m certain that the author does.
The Tower, The Zoo, and The Tortoise at Amazon.com
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