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Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Blood and Boas

Compared to many of the large snakes I've worked with, I've always thought of Dumeril's boas as fairly docile sausages.  They can get to be on the bigger side - nowhere in the same class as a green anaconda or a reticulated python, but big enough that if you happen to let yourself get distracted and one bites you, you can be sure that your attention will be redirected to the snake.  Quickly.

As it happens, I have only been present for one Dumeril's boa bite in my career, and I was not on the bitten end.  If anything, I had the more ridiculous end of the deal.

A colleague and I were taking a six-foot boa to the hospital for a radiograph.  Snakes are not naturally included to stretch out, so we did the stretching for her.  I held the tail.  He held the head.  Maybe we should have switched.

It turns out my grip on the tail was better than his grip on the head.  He was bitten on the hand.  Now, I hadn't known this about my friend - maybe it was something we was embarrassed about - but it turns out he was one of those fellows who can't stand the sight of his own blood.  It's not the pain, it's just the sensation of watching for own blood seep out of your body.  He took one look at his hand, and he started to faint. 


All of the assembled vets and vet techs grabbed him and rushed him away to treat the wound and treat shock and, I don't know, give me a cookie and juice to get his blood sugar up.  I don't know.  I wasn't there in the other room with them.  I was the one who had to still deal with the snake, who by now had gotten her first taste of human blood and apparently wanted more.

Without much in the way of options, I threw myself on the exam table and lay down on top of her, grabbing her head and pinning the rest of her down with my weight.  An angrily writhing snake under you does not feel great, especially from friction in some of the more delicate areas (particularly if it gets under your keys and radio and starts to dig those into you).  Still, I held (laid?) my ground... and that is where the vets found me twenty minutes later...

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