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Saturday, June 7, 2014

Zoo Joke: Search Warrant

A zookeeper is working in his section one day, when suddenly he feels a tap on the shoulder.  Turning around, he finds himself face to face with a police detective, flashing a bright, shiny badge in his face.

"I've received an anonymous tip that there are illegal drugs being stored at this zoo," the detective says, pulling an official-looking document from his pocket.  "I have a search warrant that authorizes me to search this entire facility until I find out if this is true or not."

The zookeeper, confused but not seeing any problems with this, agrees. He does, however, balk when he sees the detective trying to open a door that is secured with a heavy lock and chain.

"Um, I wouldn't go into that one if I were you," the zookeeper begins, cautiously.

Furiously, the detective turns on him.  "You see THIS?!?" he yells, brandishing the warrant in the zookeeper's face.  "This gives me the right to go anywhere and do anything that I deem pertinent to this investigation, no matter what anyone else says.  You got that?!?"  The zookeeper complies, backing away and apologizing.  Without another word, the detective produces a pair of bolt cutters, cuts the lock, opens the door, and walks through it.

Five seconds later, the zookeeper hears a horrified scream come from beyond the door, drowned out by an angry roar.  The detective comes tearing back out the door, running as fast as he can, with an enormous grizzly bear in hot pursuit.  With every pace, the bear is getting closer and closer until his jaws are snapping at the very coattails of the fleeing detective.

Dropping his tools, the zookeeper chases after the bear and the detective, screaming as he goes:

"The warrant!  Show him the warrant!"

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